Maxine came into my booth at the Houston Black Expo and asked the same question that everyone always ask…Where is the pound cake?  I answered saying “Yes, I have cake...not the kind of cake you want”.  Of course, her next question was so what is Pound Cake?    As we read the message on the display shirt, I explained the purpose of Pound Cake and it's concept which compares life to a pound cake.   

Life is like a pound cake...good all by itself. 
Icing (a man) can be added to enhance the taste, however;  should I not enjoy the icing...I can simply scrape it off
and my pound cake is still just as good.
                  
I informed Maxine that the shirt would also be available without the ‘a man’ reference because ‘icing’ could be anything in life – a new job, dream vacation, friends or your favorite designer shoes, etc.  We read and discussed the message for several minutes.  Maxine shared with me that she had been married for many years to her high school sweetheart and had recently divorced.  She had always been a couple and was adjusting to her new life. Before Maxine left she told me that she definitely wanted to get a shirt.

Early the next morning Maxine returned to my booth and was very excited.  She said “I want to buy my shirt now because I don’t want to forget.   And you know what?  It was meant for me to see the ‘a man’ reference on the shirt yesterday because it CHANGED my life."   Maxine was able to step back and view her life from a different angle.  I felt as if I had won the lottery and my first thought was -  Thank You LORD!!!  She got it.  Maxine understood the importance  of always embracing  one's self-worth.  The years with her husband (the icing) were over and she was going to be just fine.  She was  ready to go forward,  enjoy her life and someday meet Mr. Right.  Every time I think about  that morning with Maxine, I still get chills. Life is good...with or without!!!                             6/2012    


  

Diamond called me  and was very upset because she had to write a short biography about herself for the company newsletter.  She said, "I had a husband and I left him.  I don’t have kids...not even a   dog."  Diamond continued listing what was missing from her life compared to others.  She was not too happy.  I used  the Pound Cake message to explain why she was so upset. The things that were missing in Diamond's life were not important as long as she had her husband.  See the Pound Cake message below: 

Pound Cake                  
Mine is good…with or without!!
Life is like a pound cake…good all by itself. Icing (a man) can be added to enhance the taste, however; should I not enjoy  the icing ...I can simply scrape it off and my pound cake is still just as good.
                  
Diamond’s life was always wonderful, however; she could not see it.  She had made her husband the ‘cake’ and the 'icing'.   Over the next six months Diamond continued to focus on herself and evaluating the situations which caused the separation.   She knew that it was necessary for her to make a change and stay strong to be happy.  Diamond and her husband loved each other and wanted  to save their marriage.

One evening she and her husband were having dinner when he made an observation about her appearance.  He said, “Diamond you look really pretty tonight.  You didn't look like that when we were together.”  Diamond replied, 
“that ‘s because I was so busy taking care of you and neglecting myself.  Everything was about you  and how to make you happy.  You are only the ‘icing on my cake’.  Diamond and her husband did reconcile and are still working on their marriage.  For Diamond it is an uphill battle to stay strong and not slip back to her old ways.   So she continues to remind herself that life is like pound cake...good all by itself.  ‘Icing’... just makes it better.                               5/2005